Cause for celebration

JON: As you can see, there has been great excitement in our village this week as “we” have celebrated first the Queen’s birthday and then the 65th anniversary of liberation which is a big deal around here – in fact, A bridge too far (the film) happened more or less down the road from us. Much bunting and several parades, the highlight of the village year!

Anyway, despite a visit earlier today to our psychologist, aimed at starting to unravel the great taboo subject of whether I should be ‘allowed’ to take my medication as I want, Marie and I have managed to remain on excellent terms (nudge, nudge). Which is particularly fortunate, as we are soon to embark on a three-week tour of the USA starting in Las Vegas and ending in the Yellowstone National Park. I predict it’s going to be great! We may come across the occasional Internet café and keep you up to date, but most likely you’ll just have to wait until we are back for details.

Although I have to confess that in a fit of retail therapy I bought a new mobile phone. It may or may not work in the US (previous phones have not). It has all the bells and whistles an old techie could wish for: MP3 player, camera, internet access, all sorts of connectivities – and because it’s an Android phone it will even let me play with programming my own applets. So far, set-up has required one visit back to the shop and two total resets of the device. I actually think this is great as the thing is sure to keep me occupied for weeks and weeks. One of the best toys I’ve had in a long time.

Anyway, we shall leave cyberspace to its own devices while we’re away, and leave the house in the capable forelimbs of the cat and his cat-sitter – the girl from next door, who has a large family and therefore enjoys the quiet (and undisputed control of the TV remote) that she finds in our house when we’re away. Marie has shown me the evidence that a mole has also recently moved in, so the place will be full of life in our absence.

We leave you with the news that as our ‘fame’ spreads, we now have over 200 readers in countries ranging from Norway to Nigeria. We seem to be going global. Parkinson’s rules!

Put out to grass

JON: Although nothing has yet actually happened and no decisions have been made, we feel that we are making some progress on our house move. It’s a bit like the TV programme Escape to the Country: where we live now could be described as a large(ish) house in a faintly rural setting. The new house is bigger and is best described as being in the middle of nowhere at all. So rather than downsizing as most people do at this stage of their lives, we are out-sizing: bigger house, bigger distances, and (for me, at least) bigger trousers.

All this is very exciting right now, but at some point when the move is done and the excitement dies down, I’m going to have to find something to do with my time. I’m considering taking up fishing. It’s a “sport” where you can sit down and gaze into space whilst giving the impression that you are actually doing something. I have a pile of three books on fishing due to arrive from Amazon so I’ll soon be an expert fisherman (fisher person?).

I’m also told that the lawn in the new house will be my responsibility. The good part is that I’ll be using a ride-on mower which I’m sure will be fun for the first few mows. The bad part is that I have the attention span of a concussed gnat, and there is a lot of grass which will need weekly attention.

One excellent feature of the house is a large window looking out over a few fields to the sea beyond, bordered by small islands and full of little pleasure boats. I have decided to treat myself to a telescope as a housewarming present, and have already discovered that a decent one is not as expensive as I thought. Which is just as well since it appears ever more likely that we will buy the new house before we have sold the old one, so money might be tight for a bit. Just as well I am a man of simple tastes…